Pertaining to Fat Bears and a Bearded Lady Oh and DIAMONDS

Fuleco

The affairs of state have been keeping me very busy in the

last few weeks. As usual we have had to welcome new immigrants. Firstly we have Fuleco from Brazil.

Save ME from Extinction

 
 He is the official mascot of the 2014 HUMAN World Cup Soccer in Brazil. He has been appointed by Kind Drooley of Plushiland to help our overweight Bears Exercise. It seems that many of the Bears have too high BMI - Bears Mass Index. This means also that they are suffering from high Plush-Lestrol. Very dangerous as there internal Fluff can become hard as stone. So it has been decided that all Bears with a BMI of over 40 will have to exercise with Fuleco. I have no problem with Bears turning to stone and so did not agree with the employing of the foreigner, Fuleco but I was overruled by King Drooley on this occasion.

Gym Class for Bears with BMI over 40

The other new arrival is Plushiland is The Purple Flying Mule he is related to Emile our Xmas Donkey. So he was able to come to Plushiland on a Family Visa. Grrrr. Anyway Magento is great and he has already found a job in my office as Cultural Attache. I am adaptable if nothing else!

Ratti and Magento, Flying Donkey

Plushi-Vision Winner. Bear dressed as Tigger

Two weeks ago we had our Plushi-Vision Song Contest. And the winner was a Bear who had cross dressed as a Tigger. I mean what is the world coming too. Seems a bit unPlushi to Me(an). But of course the Bears loved it.


It is like a woman with a beard winning the HUMAN Eurovision. [a woman AS a Beard is fairly common, a woman WITH a beard less so] Oh wait that has already happened, the fabulous Conchita Wurst (Ms. Sausage).

Eurovision 2014 Winner, Conchita Wurst

Eat your heart out Dame Shirley Bassy. Okay, I like Dame Shirley more, because "DIAMONDS are forever". And Ratti loves Diamonds more than Power!!!! I would not be surprised if Ms. Wurst's Phoenix is spotted in the skies over Plushiland.

As Plushiland is not actually part of the European Yet, like the Ukraine, we will not be holding elections here in Plushiland tomorrow. Oh wait we never hold elections here. All Fluff is Equal and the least of our Fluff is Better than the best of your Flesh. ha ha ha ha. Maniacal Laughter from Ratti Von PLush. Time to take over the WORLD.....

 

Ratti Von Plush,
Great Liberal

PLUSHI Resources Director,

Keeper of the FLYFF,

DIAMOND Collector,

King of Salford,
Lord Protector of Plushiland,
Pontifex Maximus of the Great Plushi in the Sky,
Lord President of the Privy Council of Plushiland,
Grand Vizier (AY AY AY),
Office of the King,
Plushi Towers,
Plushiland

Plushiland and Christmas

I, Ratti have been so busy since my last post. Not only that THE HUMAN has been at the computer almost constantly for the last month. Who knows what HE has been doing? Never mind, Here I am again. Although I do not believe in Christmas, Bah HUMBUG (as my great friend, Scrooge, from Dickens' A Chrismas Carol said before he went all SOFT and WEAK). Some of the other silly, Plushis here in Plushiland decided to get in to the spirit. You will notice that I was not available for the silliness.

Bogden Von Plush, Count Eccles and King Drooely

Plushiland gets into Christmas Theme. Ba Humbug

I have made one concession to your Christmas. I have got myself a Battle Bambi, saving him from having to work for that Fat, Old, HUMAN, Father Christmas.

Ratti Von Plush and Cousin Battle Bambi

Ratti Von Plush, Battle Bambi, Cousin Erica and Eustace Kangaroo, Tollie (Hegar) King Drooley, Eccles, Margi and Edna

Plushiland at Christmas Time in 2012 in Brit-Plush (England). The Plushis on the Right were our hosts. I am third from the left.

 I, Ratti von Plush will be taking my annual holiday soon. I will be travelling to Brit-Plush (England).

 If YOU HUMANS are going to be giving us Plushis as gifts at Christmas, please make sure that your small HUMANS have clean hands. Although, we Plushis are quite happy to extend Plushiland. I belief in the one PLushi_spy in each HUMAN household policy. We Plushis hate our Fluff being dirtied by sticky hands, or being drooled on by YOUR offspring. Horrible. How do you think King Drooley got his name? I will try and educate YOU HUMANS about proper Plushi-Care, but you are not always the brightest. So reaally it is an up hill battel for me.

Here are some pictures of Plushis in a shop display, in the Kingdom of Angie Merkel. DO not call it Kraut-Plush, that is just plain rude!! She was Voted in as Chancellor for third time, in parliament yesterday. Her coalition has an 80% majority. And People say, That I, Ratti Von PLush am anti-demofluffic.
Cute pictures....

Now that is what I call an Battle Kangeroo

Too Cute 1

Too Cute 2

Well it has been a busy year for me and I know that the new year of the PLush will be as busy. I am diversifying my interests and will be launching a number of InterFluff projects in 2014. So expect to see lots more of Ratti von PLush in the new Year.



So if you are going to give presents make sure that they are decent ones, otherwise DO NOT BOTHER!

You might want to consider giving a donation to the Battersea Dogs and Cats Home, instead of drinking out all your money. They take care of homeless Cats and Dogs. Or what about all the work done with my Kangaroo

Cyrus, the Airport Kangaroo. Copyright http://www.wildlifevictoria.org.au

Cousins, who desperately need your help. Read Cyrus's story and watch the youtube clip. In a very sad case Poor Hilary was shot with two arrows and died as a result of her injuries.  Read the sad story here. Have a heart and make a donation. Apparently, the having a Heart thing is what makes you HUMAN. I am not convinced.

Ratti Von Plush
Lord Protector of Plushiland,
Pontifex Maximus of the Great Plushi in the Sky,
Lord President of the Privy Council of Plushiland,
Grand Vizier (AY AY AY),
Office of the King,
Plushi Towers,
Plushiland

Badgers, Police and Democracy/Democra-Fluff

According to the guardian.see link the Police are passing protesters's [against the killing of BADGERS] details over to the Farmer's Union in the UK. Gosh, now that is really surprising.

Just like my Bat NSA, tells me what the Teddy Bears are up to in Plushiland. And how do you think I know what is going on in the HUMAN WORLD. I get reports from all my Plushi-Spies [obviously not Teddy Bears - they like HUMANS too much. Real case of Stockholm Syndrome] in your HUMAN HOUSES. Anyway, the police here in Plushiland would not support the killing of Badgers. The Organs of the state saying "Please, no I am just doing my job", that excuse cannot be used since the Second HUMAN World War, or Apartheid in South Africa.

Is it just me? Or are some [one does need to be reasonable and not imply ALL] Police particularly nasty. In UK, Shooting innocent people, killing people at demonstrations [okay one HUMAN and he had a weak heart, well he did after he was pushed by the policeman]. So supporting the killing of BADGERS seems the next step....At recent protests in Frankfurt, Germany the police were also a bit over keen to protect commercial interests.

Of course WE do not have protests in Plushiland. Everyone is happy with OUR Non-Democratic System in Plushiland. We have a ruling Council, the Privy Council that represents the needs of all Plushis, so they do not have to worry about Democra-Fluff. We have a perfect system here. Non- Represenatitive Plushi Democra-Fluff (NRPDF).

Privy Council serves the needs of all Plushis

Bit like HUMAN China, okay that is much more complicated. I cannot be bothered to find out anyway. I am very busy, I have to arrange a Teddy Bears's Tea Party. UGH how horrible. Silly Bears and their religion.

I also need to send my best wished to the old [double meaning intentional] and new Germany Queen, Angie, the First of that Name.

What the Greek Papers think

Will she rule longer than Baroness, Margaret Thatcher, the First of England? At least MT had policies......The statement does not imply that Ratti Von Plush supports these Policies.

Speaking of Democa-Fluff, I had  long meeting, at the weekend with the God-King, Tutankhamun. Or Rather his Plushi Counterpart, King Tuti-Bear, from Manchester, England. Tuti had some good ideas, about things like slavery and so on.... Tuti also had a Grand Vizier, AY. [so I am in good company as King Drooley's Grand Vizier] And it is simply not true that the Grand Vizier killed the King, Tuti.

King Tuti Bear, Ratti Von Plush and Edna as the Scribe

Maybe Having God Kings has put the Egyptians off Democra-Fluff permanently?Too soon? Too Late?

I visited the Plushi Aristocracy at weekend in Disney Mews.

Ratti Von Plush and Edna visit the Disney Mews, home of the Plushi Aristocracy. Few Bears!

There have been some complaints that religion is not mentioned enough in my posts. So I am now naming myself, the Pontifex Maximus of the Great Plushi in the Sky. [This is why I have to organise the Teddy Bears's Tea Party] I have this very original IDEA, I am hoping to use religion to control the Teddy Bears, not sure if it will work.

Dr. Dr. Dr. Dr. Professor Woody studies SCIENCE

Oh Yes, HUMANS you are supposed to actually follow the links I have added to this post. It is to help educated YOU.

  I am not doing this for my health but wealth send the DIAMONDS to:

Ratti Von Plush
Pontifex Maximus of the Great Plushi in the Sky
Lord President of the Privy Council of Plushiland
Grand Vizier (AY AY AY)
Office of the King
Plushi Towers
Plushiland








PS if you find any spelling or grammar mistakes, remember Engrish is not my first language. Email corretions to: von.plush@googlemail.com or seem me on facebook: Ratti Von Plush I want to be YOUR friend.

Design a Flag Competition for Plushiland

King Drooley, the First of that Name, of Plushiland. My BOSS?

South African Flag

King Drooley has instructed me to run a “Design a Flag for Plushiland” completion. Basically we need a flag for our country. No Underpants design like the South African flag.

Democracy is one thing, taste clearly is another. Democracy is not to my taste, but that is just me. I am a little dictator with big plans. Anyway we need a flag, so get on and design one. I told King Drooley that you HUMANS are both too dumb and too lazy to design a flag. If there are no suitable suggestions from YOU, by the 15

 ^th day, of the 10^th month, in the year of our Great Plushi in the SKY, 2013; then I will put something forward. We are still using the HUMAN calendar, soon to be replaced by the year of the RATTI. Also known as the Rattorian Calendar, which started in 2003. So 2013 is the 10^th year of The Ratti. Email your designs to von.plush@googlemail.com Obviously you assign all legal rights to the design to me, Ratti Von Plush when you send me anything.....ha ha ha.... I am on Facebook as Ratti Von Plush. be my friend...

The first prize is: not being sent to a Plushian Gulag. The prize has been generously sponsored by President Pushtin of PLUSHIA. I believe in the Carrot and Stick, but without the Carrots, obviously. 

Ratti Von Plush,
Lord President of the Privy Council & Grand Vizier,
Office of the King,
Plushi Towers,
Plushiland

HUMANS Murdering Badgers in England

Today, I am extremely Upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It seems that after all the questionable evidence and Protests to stop the Murdering of Badgers in England, the Tory Goverment and those less than useless Lib Dems have allowed Farmers (or their Evil Agents Hunters) to start killing Badgers in a Test Cull. 5000 Badgers will be murdered in England in the next few weeks. Shot when they leave their underground Homes. It should really come as no surprise that Farmers and their Union are in favour of killing Badgers. Farmers and Conservatives now that is a surprise. I mean Farmers are in the business of killing things are they not. The poor cattle that the measure is supposed to protect/help, end up in the pot or on the HUMAN table anyway. I am sorry I cannot see the difference between killing a cow because it has TB or you want to chop it up and eat it. But then again I do not understand the concept of Capitalism/Money fully/eating the Seared Flesh of Animals.

So cows hardly have any quality of life either. To be kept pregnant the whole time to produce milk, kept alive with anti-biotics, then killed. Their Babies taken away from them. The Male Baby Cows (Calves), locked into boxes, and then killed to star as Veal on your plate. Or just shot anyway, because nobody, quite rightly, wants to eat the Veal now a days. Perhaps less money from the EU to farmers to produce MILK and more money to Plushiland. Common Agricultural Policy - Kiss My Fluffy Butt. Wonderful things HUMANS, so clever, SO DUMB and SUCH KILLERS. You can give up meat and milk and the rest of your Cruelty Products you stuff down your throats. Soja is perfectly fine for you LOT. All Plushis in Plushiland are Fluff-arian.

But I would like you to consider your Democra-Fluff. The people said/say they did not want the Badgers killed, and the Govt just ignores them. HUMANS protested against the invasion of Iraq (reminds me of the questionable evidence of weapons of mass destruction) and your Govt's ignored YOU. I think that you should really start asking yourself if Democra-Fluff (or as you know it Democracy) still exists in the HUMAN world. Let's not forget the fact that you are constantly being SPIED on by your LEADERS.

All the CREATURES here is Plushiland are holding a Silence Week for the Badgers of England. In That time we will refuse to interact or comfort any of YOU lot. I for my part will be biting any HUMANS that come my way. Edna has promised to Poo in their Handbags and Cars.

Edna ready to do Her bit for the Badgers

From a Very CROSSS...
Ratti Von Plush
Grand Vizier Plushiland
Office of the King
Plushi Towers
Plushiland

Robert MugaBear Wants It ALL

Robert MugaBear, wearing another Bear's HAT

My Erstwhile Dear Friend, Robert MugaBear has been in the news again. He has addressed his followers after declaring himself the winner of the recent elections in ZimBearwe. He is a very pretty bear and I can see why he has he is so popular, as I explained in my previous post. We know that he toke control of all farms not owned by Bears. He has decided that all business in ZimBearwe including the banks need to be owned and controlled by Bears only. He is taking about Affirmative Bearing. This means that only Bears can be in positions of power and own things (LIKE FLUFF).

While I do support his right to declare himself the Democrat-Fluff elected President for Life of ZimBearwe, I have a very big problem with him saying that only Bears can have Fluff/Stuff. As a Kangaroo and a Disney, I think his attitude is totally unacceptable. He has put Bear, Non-Bear Plushi relations back several years. I also think that perhaps he has not been as good for ZimBearwe's Plush-conomy as he would like us to think. In fact in 2009 he simply did away with the ZimBearwe Dollar because it was worthless. Many of his Bears have no FLuff to eat at all.

Due to these recent developments in ZimBearwe, I will not be meeting him at the Annual, Plushi-Despots, Tyrants and President's for Life conference in Syria-Bear next week. I think we will have to see what happens in term of the relations between Plushiland and ZimBearwe. But I think we might be re-entering the time of Lukewarm International Rat-lationships.

Ratti Von Plush

Princes Georges of Brit-Plush, Not More Bears

Ratti Von Plush

It seems that those Bears in Brit-Plush have been very busy. While I was away on my official tour to Brussels the Royal Bear Family of Brit-Plush have added to their family. As I have said before I am of the opinion that there are more than enough Bears in the whole as it is, so we really do not need anymore. But there is just no stopping Bears.

I know it is about two weeks after the news hit the world headlines, and those Brit-Plushis have made such a fuss of their addition. I mean it is not like they are a Democra-Fluff, what with a ruling class of Queen and King Bears. Happily our own King Drooley is no relation of this lot.

In this picture on the right you can see Prince William Brit-Plush and Lady Kate. Then the three young Princes, two Bears and a Squirrel. It seems that the royals always need a spare so there are three Prince Georgies: No1, No2 and No3. The Squirrel seems to have jumped through the open window of the Nursery. Now nobody is sure if he is a royal Prince or not. And because red squirrels are endeanged in Brit-Plush they cannot just throw him out. So now there are three possible Prince Georges. It is always a bit difficult with the Royal Brit-PLushis to say who the father or even the mother is. Also Bears can give birth to Squirrels in Plushiland. Nothing strange there.

Notice the Royal Gauards in the middle of the picture and on the left Members of the Commonwealth, celebrating the Birth: South Africa, Australia, Canada. Other Commonwealth Bears were not around at the time. Notice how Scotland-Plush is going his own way.

The picture below shows the new arrival with Silver Spoons and Scotland changing his position.

 I am not sure if I will be invited to the Christening of the Princes, but I am not that bothered really. Enough to keep me busy here in Plushiland.

Robert MugaBear wins in ZimBearwe

President MugaBear and his Election Helpers

I am very happy to report that my good friend (even though he is a Bear) President MugaBear of ZimBearwe has been re-elected for a further 500 years. That is what I really like about Democra-FLuff once you are in power you can stay forever. Most of the Roman Emperors did not manage to for rule for 33 years, so well done to the Democra-Fluff and Emperor MugaBear. Sorry I meant to say President for Life. I was also pleased to see the way in which the Election Helper helped the Bears Of ZimBearwe make the RIGHT decision. No pressure of course. I too am building up my private army here in Plushiland. And with the help of my NSA, I am sure that I can be Grand Vizier for life.

Plushi-Towers, Plushia - Off to Jail, DemocraFluff

The Humans who share myspace here continue to hang there wet shirts in front of PLushi-Towers. It is either things that have been washed or even worse shirts that have been worn to work (not sure what work means, sounds bad, worse than me). Really this INDIGNITY must stop at once. I have just signed an executive order in this regard.

And in other news in Plushia - King (I mean President) Pushtin (my hero) has sent another HUMAN to Jail for disagreeing with him. Now that is what I call power. Just like I said last time "OFF WITH THEIR HEADS". The Plushies in Plushiland have it far better than the HUMANS in Plushia. President Plushtin has rewritten the Book on DemocraFluff. OH Well. I am also trying for Ratti Von Plush to be Grand Vizier for life. Just like they have it in Plushia, with the strong HUMAN, President Plushtin. Now if he would only send Tedward Snowbear back to me, to stand trial. In an open and fair process, the way they have in Plushia, all order will be restored. Enjoy your DemocraFluff - while it lasts - assuming there is any left. Soon DemocraFluff, will be deFluffed.

De-Fluffing, is not nearly as attractive.