Ratti's Treasure, Polar Bear and Plane Crash

Summer 2014 has been a very busy time for me, what with all the affairs of Plushiland to look after. I thought it would be nice if I showed you photos of my treasure, Diamonds and cold hard cash. I think it is really important to have portable property. To follow Mr Charles Dickens in Great Expectations. I now have a beautiful case, not box, to keep all my treasure in when I travel.

Diamonds and Cash

Of course when I get more Diamonds I will have to get a bigger suitcase.

On a educational note, it turns out that them Dinosaurs were fluffy too. Some of them had feathers.  

It is far too hot in Plushiland at the moment, and I really hope that the heat wave will end soon. Us Plushis do not like the heat at all. Spare a thought for Arturo, the poor Polar bear stuck in Argentina, in 40 degree Celsius (Like a million Degrees Fahrenheit, I believe) because the BAD MAN won't send him to a ZOO in Canada.

Send Arturo to Canada, you BAD MAN!

One more distressing picture to go, then my work is done. No doubt you will all have heard about the plane shot down over the Ukraine. Enough have been said about it already. I want to leave you with a terrible image from the Guardian Newspaper. You can read the article entitled :

Graphic content: when photographs of carnage are too upsetting to publish

The caption from the Guardian: "A child's belongings from the MH17 crash: 'Images such as these can be as heartbreaking a sight as the body-bagged corpses that once owned them.'" Photograph: Maxim Zmeyev/Reuters

On this note I will leave you, to ponder what it means to be Human and Alive. Hopefully, next time I will have happier news to report?! But YOU HUMANS are in charge, so it seems doubtful.

Ratti Von Plush,
Great Liberal

PLUSHI Resources Director,

Keeper of the FLYFF,

DIAMOND Collector,

King of Salford,
Lord Protector of Plushiland,
Pontifex Maximus of the Great Plushi in the Sky,
Lord President of the Privy Council of Plushiland,
Grand Vizier (AY AY AY),
Office of the King,
Plushi Towers,
Plushiland

Plushiland Football/Soccer Cup

Many of you are no doubt wondering why there has been no news form Plushiland. Well as you have all been watching the Soccer World Cup in Brazil. We in Plushiland have been holding our own competitions. Of course we have not had riots in Plushiland of the underclass. There are of course no underclass Plushis. All Flyff / Fluff is EQUAL.

Neither are our teams nationalistic either. YOU HUMANS can learn something from us PLushis. Our players are not paid horrific amounts of money for running after a ball. Well anyway I have been refereeing a few games. We are still busy with the initial games.

Bunnies vs Tiggers No referee!

Beanie Bears vs Kangaroo, Ratti as Referee

Mice and Rats vs Elephants

Birds and Bat (and Prince George, Squirrel) vs Africans

 Well that will have to do for now. Off to referee a late game. PS I am happy to report that the English Soccer is as good as ever, NOT!

Ratti writing his blog. Help from new Intern (Smiley Von Plush)

Ratti Von Plush,
Great Liberal

PLUSHI Resources Director,

Keeper of the FLYFF,

DIAMOND Collector,

King of Salford,
Lord Protector of Plushiland,
Pontifex Maximus of the Great Plushi in the Sky,
Lord President of the Privy Council of Plushiland,
Grand Vizier (AY AY AY),
Office of the King,
Plushi Towers,
Plushiland

Plushis are the Victims of HUMAN Relationships

I assume that most of my regular readers know what a Plushi is. But for those new fans of Ratti. A Plushi is a Soft or Cuddly Toy; more often than not a Teddy Bear. Like I have said before, I am not the greatest fan of the Teddy Bear, but it is what you HUMANS seem to think of first.

I want to rant and rave about how you HUMANS use us Plushis as Objects of TRANSFERENCE ABUSE. When a silly, small, HUMAN, I think you call them CHILDREN, falls in LOVE for the first time, they give the object of their affection a Plushi. This Plushi is supposed to be a token of the “LOVE” that the one HUMAN feels for the other one.

And it is not only the small HUMANS that give Plushis to each other, the adults also do it. For Valentine’s Day (absolute rubbish – Capitalist Clap Trap – Money making racket, buying affection. A Bad, movie and cheap dinner, anyone. And endless red roses that die...)

Or even Anniversaries (those days you get to remind yourself - if you remember the day at all- that you are chained in obligation and despair to another, boring, disappointing, underachieving HUMAN, usually called your “HUSBAND” or “WIFE”.

The problem is that the person who receives the Plushi does not want a PLushi, they want DIAMONDS or GOLF CLUBS or a new CAR. That is assuming that they do not want a new “HUSBAND” or “WIFE” and to replace you with a better model, with electric windows and a decent job.......and DIAMONDS... Did I mention DIAMONDS. I think I forgot DIAMONDS.

The point is, that not only does the person not want the Plushi, they do not take proper care of it. Plushis need special attention that most HUMANS are not qualified to give. If that is not bad enough, when the HUMAN Relationship turns sour, the poor Plushi will suffer still further abuse and neglect. The person sees the Plushi as being the same as the person (Transfer Object) who gave it to them. And because the HUMAN cannot De-Fluff or pull off the head of their previous partner, they do it to the PLUSHI. This is called TRANSFERENCE ABUSE. A Plushi, who cannot protect itself against such abuse! It is for this reason that Plushis should not be given as gifts by HUMANS when in “LOVE”.

Rocki, The Great

I recently heard about a poor PLushi, Lobster called Rocki. Rocki was a gift to a HUMAN from another HUMAN. At the time the gift was made, the HUMAN liked the other HUMAN, but not the Plushi in question. Rocki was excluded and unloved. Now as it happens the HUMAN no longer likes the other HUMAN, and likes Rocki even less. So now you can imagine what further abuse that he will suffer. Either being left at the top of a dirty cupboard; being dumped in the rubbish; or the worst fate that can befall a Plushi, be given to some horrible small, HUMAN with dirty hands and a Black Soul. You have all seen the Toy Story films.

It is for this reason that I am starting a fund for Abandoned HUMAN Relationship PLushis. Please give generously. I, Ratti von Plush, will be administering the fund. DIAMONDS preferred but cheques and cash (gold and silver coins), also accepted to: [Paymate account soon to be set up]

Diamonds for Abandoned HUMAN Relationship Plushis's FUND

Abandoned HUMAN Relationship Plushis’s Fund

C/O Ratti von Plush

Grand Vizier

Office of the King

Plushi Towers

Plushiland

Olinguito - Not Another Bear!!!

One of my many HUMAN fans has suggested that I will be posting about the new Bear/Cat Mammal Combo, the OLINGUITO. Sounds like something on the Menu at MCFluffy, it would not surprise me one bit. We all know what goes into the Krusty Burgers on The Simpsons.

For all those who have not seen a picture of the Olinguito. Here are two pictures.

Ratti's Olinguito

From CNN

See the two pictures are exactly the same. I am a really good artist, in addition to all my other skills: including but not limited to Spying and Dictatorship, and Kingship....

I am not sure what all the Fluff is about anyway. Like I need competition from another Super Cute, CREATURE. I mean really. Just when I thought I was cuter than all the rest. Well that is what my mirror says every morning, when I look into it and ask the familiar question,"Who is the Cutest Plushi of ALL? Neither the Camera nor Mirror Lie, just like politicians. Some HUMANS are now worried that the poor Olinguito will be extinct in no time. Just like all the other CREATURES that The HUMANS have wiped out with there Greed for MORE FLUFF/STUFF. I have all the FLUFF I need. I JUST take what I need from the Royal Fluffery. If the Olinguito becomes extinct we have all the Stuffed versions, just like the crowd here in Plushiland, and we are ALL very much ALIVE!!!

Besides I will show you how you get to make some more Olinguitos, really easy, Just let the natural process happen.

Parents of the Olinguito?

As I said about the Prince Greoges, Bears can have Squirrel Children. So Imagine we can have he same here. The Storks bring all the new children, or at least shopping bags and Gift wrap in PLushiland.

One additional rant. How are those IDIOT HUMANS in SOUTH AMERICA that are looking for OIL in a nature reserve???? They wanted the West to give them money not to dig up their own NATURAL HERITAGE. And YOU, HUMANS are supposed to be inTELLIGENT. We Plushi's do not destroy our environment unlike YOU Greedy HUMANs. Make Ratti your KING and I will sort out all the HUMAN Problems.

Your marvelous Ratti Von Plush
Grand Vizier, Master of All I See (and soon to be KING of the HUMANS)
Office of The King
Plushi-Towers
Plushiland

Elie Tusk's HyperTrunk

Business Plushi, Elie Tusk proposes High Speed Travel

Just got back from a visit to parts of Plushiland. You know that I am very popular ruler here and everyone wanted to see me. But my NSA intelligence service [remember the Bats and Pig)

tells me that someone has been logging onto my accounts. I think I know who it is, that Cheddar and Essence. They are always trying to get the better of me. But I know that I am far, fa,r cuter than they are, and that is all that counts. Be it in Plushiland or the HUMAN world. The Beautiful are always worshiped, and quite right too. So you see that is why, I Ratti am so popular, both in Plushiland and with you HUMANs.

By the way, it seems that that hyper over achieving Plushi, Elie Tusk has proposed a new way to travel. He is calling it the HyperTrunk. Basically there is a long tube shaped like elephant trunks. You sit inside small tree trunks and the elephants blow you along the Trunk-Tube. Apparently, the first attempt will be to link Los Plushi and San Fran-Fluff-co. But Elie Tusk is so busy with his other business ventures, sending Plushies into space and developing is Plush-Car that he does not have the time to develop the idea further.

Of course Elie has lots of Plushi-Dollars, he is a Plushi-Dollar-Trillionaire. He made most of his Plushi-Dollars from his horrible payment system PayMate, that he later sold to E-Bay-Plushi-Division. I, the great Ratti, think he has more money than brains. I am sure that the system will not work. We in Plushiland will still be walking around for a long time to come. I think the plan will be as successful as the first HUMAN railway between Manchester and Liverpool in Brit-Plush all those years ago.

I must go now and think of a suitable punishment for Cheddar and Essence.

Your marvelous Ratti Von Plush
Grand Vizier, Master of All I See

Office of The King
Plushi-Towers
Plushiland

Royal Brussels Trip - Diplomatic Briefing

In my last post I said we were on a Royal Visit to Brussels. We had so many appointments that I did not have time to post anything. So I will provide you with an update, as I am sure you would all like to know how it went. I have published some photos on my facebook page. SO GO AND LOOK!!!

The trip was okay, unfortunately I did not travel alone, Edna was not carsick for a change and did not use the car as a sandbox. She is not a good traveller, so we had to stop off for her to go to the FLuff-WC.

On Day two of my visit we went to the seaside. We took a local with us, our host, Blue-sie Bee. But he did not really know what was happening and complained about getting his PLush wet and the hot sun. A real cry-bee if you ask me. Anyway we were staying at his house so we had to be nice. grr grr

 Once we got to the seaside. We had out photo shoot. But all the others wanted to be in my photos and worse they wanted their own photos. I insisted on having some private photos taken. The photographer agreed after I threatened to have him de-Flufed.
Here you see Count Eccles (Orange Ribbon), King Drooley (blue T-shirt), Blue-sie Bee, Right Hon. Tollie(Brown Otter), Lady Edna (Roo with Blue jumper) and ME (Might Ratti Von Plush), sitting on our travel bag.

 Here is one of my private photos. See how the yellow matches my new green ribbon of office. Across the see you can get to Engl-Plush. Famous for it Bankkers, and other fatcats.

After the photoshoot we had to spend several hours in the boot of the car. It was very hot in our travel bag. But all Plushis go to sleep immediately it is dark. Edna kept poking here tail in my eye. And the silly Bee kept complaining. On the trip back, the idiot humans did not let us sit in the car again. wE HAD  to stay in the boot/truck for the retunr trip to Brusels. Off with their HEAds!!!

oF YES we did have FLuff-Falafels in Pita before we were locked in the car. I am sure those fluffies working at the shop had dirty paws because, Edna got car sick on the way back as well. The again she is nearly always sick in the car. SO all in all not the best day out for me.

 Photo of my new official robes of state, as have been published on my facebook page. Notice how Edna and Tollie are trying to get in on the action. I had to fire the photographer after all. He was rather dumn even for a Teddy Bear.

Imagine my surprise and disgust when I woke after the horrible trip to find that there was a new member of Plushi-Land. This is in spite of my edict against additional immigrants. What really worries me is that he is sooo Cute. I really hate the competition. I will have to dream up some assignment for him in some dark corner of Plushi-Towers. Maybe the basement where he is never seen again. ha ha ha. His name is Carre Four Von Plush and he only speaks Franco-Fluff. And rattles on about Common Agricultural Policy, or something like that. He has a number of friends here, being a Disney. His Cousin Chou-Chou, who has been around here for years, has always irritated my FLuFF (my insides). He has always been a burr in my FLuFF.

 After a days rest I had my official meeting at the European Parliament on Fluffday (Friday). Just to remind you dear reader I am only 10 years old, and spelling is not my thing.


Me waiting for the EU Representative, who was late by the way. Notice how I am being carried on hands by the Humans. They know their place. By the way I do know the difference between their and there, were and where. But do you???? Hey hEY?

See I am wearing my Green Ribbon of office. I did not tell the rest of my travel companions about my meeting. Only Edna, and she was not allowed to come. The carry bag was too small. besides she needed to rest after the night before. SHe had still not recovered form all the FLush-Beer and VOdka Red-Fluff-bulls she had had the previous night out. Meeting the wild Plushies of Brussels.


Me at the Window, looking down on the peasants. Also known as Humans.

 Me walking up the stairs to the meeting.

 Me waiting to speak to the delegates in the EU Parliament.

Talking my place as Representative of Plushi-Land in the European Parliment. Had to have a Fluff-poo on Nigel Farage's desk. ha ha . Down with Euro-Plush Sceptics!!!

Sitting on the CHairman's seat. Addressing the Chamber. Having a well earned lunch at the European Parliament Canteen.

 All this is mine, mine, mine!

I asked the Euro-Plush Parlaiament for money. Here me and the shredded pre-Euro currency. But Seems there is no money for East Plushiland after all. Seems everything has gone to the Brit-Plush rebate and the new PLushi's from Croat-FLuff. At least I got my lunch for free.

This concludes my Diplomatic Briefing of my trip to the Euro-Plush Parliament.